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Oisterboy · 01-20-2009, 11:16 AM

I know we have a lot of these types of threads...but heres a little bit of a different scenario for ya.

I got a call yesterday from one of my friends, to say that my other friends dad died. I am really good buddies with this kid, and I've talked with his mom a few times. I've never spoken with his dad, but I've seen him around.

Now, I'm a very rational thinker, and one should never feel bad for the dead. No, they should instead feel bad for the ones who are still living that are going to MISS the dead.

That said, I feel horrible for my friend. I've had friends and family die before...but that was different.

What I'm wondering...is what should I do for my friend? I mean, I've already sent him some messages saying that I'm here for him, that I'm sorry for his loss, that he can call me any time to chat with me, and that he's a good friend.

I just feel like I should be doing more, ya know? I feel like I should be DOING something for him, even though he didn't ask me. I know nothing is going to distract the passing of a loved one, but I mean...I'd just like to ease it for him...even if its for just a minute or two.

Suggestions?

TheWiseGuy · 01-20-2009, 11:23 AM

hmm maybe you should take him to hang out....one time i had someone i knew and dated for a while attempt suicide...i thought they died i was weak everywhere crying my *** off....my friends and family hated seeing me like that so they just took me out like for an all day thing and put me in situations where it was physically impossible to be sad...at the end of the day i ended up cheering up felt much better still sad and missed her but i felt better...then i found out she didnt end up dying but thats a diff story that i wont say now because i wont derail your thread....but what im tryna say is force some laughs or a good time on him...that works...its like rape..only with laughter

Oisterboy · 01-20-2009, 11:27 AM

Rape him with laughter.

Check.

Lol. I dunno though, I don't really wanna take away his time with his family. I think he should be at home right now.

Poor dude, he lives like an hour and a half away, and has school next Monday

Maver64 · 01-20-2009, 11:27 AM

Remind him of exams.

Magato · 01-20-2009, 11:28 AM

Honestly really telling him sorry and that if you want to hang out or talk about is really all you can do and hope for the best. Tho watch for depression not a good thing so if hes feeling down pull a joke or maybe pull out something of his favorite snack lol

but other then that i would try to avoid making him think about his dad cuz shit man thats not a thing you want to think about

Oisterboy · 01-20-2009, 11:32 AM

My all time best friend is his girlfriend, so at least he doesn't live alone I guess. He doesn't seem like one to get caught up in depression. He's a very real dude...a lot like me in many many ways (his outlook on life anyway).

I mean, I think he'll be OK once the initial shock gets over with.

Good idea with his favorite snack. I think I'll snag him a few bags of that beef jerky he loves so much haha.

Maver64 · 01-20-2009, 11:32 AM

Although some people need time to think about a situation like that, usually thinking about what his dad has done for him and he will probably go into some stages where hes gonna say he never did enough for his dad.

He could either think it out for a couple days and eventually get calm.

chikininiman · 01-20-2009, 11:35 AM

give her a lot of chicks.. haha

TheWiseGuy · 01-20-2009, 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oisterboy

Rape him with laughter.

Check.

Lol. I dunno though, I don't really wanna take away his time with his family. I think he should be at home right now.

Poor dude, he lives like an hour and a half away, and has school next Monday

no he cant be home or with his family...itll all remind him of his dad...which will cause him to get sad all over again...he has to be around stuff that doesnt remind him at all of his dad so he can be at ease...then afterwards itll be an easier pill for him to swallow

Thalamast · 01-20-2009, 12:01 PM

when my friends dad died we took him out bowling and we were throwing bowling balls at each others heads

it made him completely forget about it and relaxed and he handled it better when he went home

01-20-2009, 11:16 AM	#1 (permalink)
Oisterboy \| (• ◡•)\| (❍ᴥ❍ʋ) Join Date: May 2006 Location: Just Past Jupiter Posts: 16,555 Reputation: 644	Dealing With Death I know we have a lot of these types of threads...but heres a little bit of a different scenario for ya. I got a call yesterday from one of my friends, to say that my other friends dad died. I am really good buddies with this kid, and I've talked with his mom a few times. I've never spoken with his dad, but I've seen him around. Now, I'm a very rational thinker, and one should never feel bad for the dead. No, they should instead feel bad for the ones who are still living that are going to MISS the dead. That said, I feel horrible for my friend. I've had friends and family die before...but that was different. What I'm wondering...is what should I do for my friend? I mean, I've already sent him some messages saying that I'm here for him, that I'm sorry for his loss, that he can call me any time to chat with me, and that he's a good friend. I just feel like I should be doing more, ya know? I feel like I should be DOING something for him, even though he didn't ask me. I know nothing is going to distract the passing of a loved one, but I mean...I'd just like to ease it for him...even if its for just a minute or two. Suggestions? __________________

01-20-2009, 11:23 AM	#2 (permalink)
TheWiseGuy OnRPG Elite Member! Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Onrpg Posts: 4,649 Reputation: 82	hmm maybe you should take him to hang out....one time i had someone i knew and dated for a while attempt suicide...i thought they died i was weak everywhere crying my *** off....my friends and family hated seeing me like that so they just took me out like for an all day thing and put me in situations where it was physically impossible to be sad...at the end of the day i ended up cheering up felt much better still sad and missed her but i felt better...then i found out she didnt end up dying but thats a diff story that i wont say now because i wont derail your thread....but what im tryna say is force some laughs or a good time on him...that works...its like rape..only with laughter __________________

01-20-2009, 11:27 AM	#3 (permalink)
Oisterboy \| (• ◡•)\| (❍ᴥ❍ʋ) Join Date: May 2006 Location: Just Past Jupiter Posts: 16,555 Reputation: 644	Rape him with laughter. Check. Lol. I dunno though, I don't really wanna take away his time with his family. I think he should be at home right now. Poor dude, he lives like an hour and a half away, and has school next Monday __________________

01-20-2009, 11:27 AM	#4 (permalink)
Maver64 `Doll's Dishwasher Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Gold Shire Posts: 1,476 Reputation: 54	Remind him of exams. __________________

01-20-2009, 11:32 AM	#6 (permalink)
Oisterboy \| (• ◡•)\| (❍ᴥ❍ʋ) Join Date: May 2006 Location: Just Past Jupiter Posts: 16,555 Reputation: 644	My all time best friend is his girlfriend, so at least he doesn't live alone I guess. He doesn't seem like one to get caught up in depression. He's a very real dude...a lot like me in many many ways (his outlook on life anyway). I mean, I think he'll be OK once the initial shock gets over with. Good idea with his favorite snack. I think I'll snag him a few bags of that beef jerky he loves so much haha. __________________

01-20-2009, 11:28 AM	#5 (permalink)
Magato Banned Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: The DogMan Cave! Posts: 1,355 Reputation: 17	Honestly really telling him sorry and that if you want to hang out or talk about is really all you can do and hope for the best. Tho watch for depression not a good thing so if hes feeling down pull a joke or maybe pull out something of his favorite snack lol but other then that i would try to avoid making him think about his dad cuz shit man thats not a thing you want to think about

01-20-2009, 11:32 AM	#7 (permalink)
Maver64 `Doll's Dishwasher Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Gold Shire Posts: 1,476 Reputation: 54	Although some people need time to think about a situation like that, usually thinking about what his dad has done for him and he will probably go into some stages where hes gonna say he never did enough for his dad. He could either think it out for a couple days and eventually get calm. __________________

01-20-2009, 11:35 AM	#8 (permalink)
chikininiman Luigi’s Pizza Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 145 Reputation: 16	give her a lot of chicks.. haha

01-20-2009, 12:01 PM	#10 (permalink)
Thalamast Banned Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: New Jersey Posts: 2,875 Reputation: 24	when my friends dad died we took him out bowling and we were throwing bowling balls at each others heads it made him completely forget about it and relaxed and he handled it better when he went home

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