Free MMORPG Forums

Originally Posted by birdman16

Anyway.. F girls... my gf of 3 years.. we broke up, she is already seeing someone... didn't wanna wait to get over me I guess.

Originally Posted by hian

I'm going to be brutally honest here - but you might want to consider that she's holding you off, simply because she isn't really that interested in you.
Unless we're talking about people with firm principles and a certain level of maturity, it isn't unusual for people to "flirt", "string along", "keep all doors open" with one or several partners without actually having any plans of dating any of them.

The reason is simple, not everybody(hardly anybody in my experience) experiences love at first sight, but rather evaulate potential partners over time and require even more time to know if they actually want a long-term relationship with the person in question.

You said yourself that she was into another person as well - Taken that into account, she might just be the kind of person who likes several people at the same time, and simply wants to keep distance until she knows for certain what her chances are.
I know several girls who do this(in fact any girl I've met, who didn't suffer from "twilight-syndrom"), stringing along several potential targets, semi-dating all of them, until she after a few months picks the one she likes best, or discards all of them for something else completely.

If this is the case(not saying that it is), then you might as well leave while you have the chance. It's a lose/lose situation. If she doesn't pick you, you lose. If she picks you, you're still dating a calculating girl with sociopathic tendencies that will probably dump you sooner or later when she thinks she's found good replacement for you. And even if she doesn't, the relationship will probably create a huge amount of troubles for you both socially and psychologically.

I know we don't choose the people we get interested in, but seriously, it's better to discard a potential partner that is potentially harmfull to you, regardless of how much you like them. There are always more fish in the sea, and if you look for a while you're bound to find a girl you like, and is nice, at the same time.

If a girl you meet is:
-Persistently lying
-Apparently lacks of remorse or empathy for others
-Poor behavioral controls -expressions of irritability, annoyance, impatience, threats, aggression, and verbal abuse; inadequate control of anger and temper
-Promiscuity
-Tendency to violate the boundaries and rights of others
-Inability to tolerate boredom

then you've just ticked off more than half of the traits that qualifies people who actually suffers from antisocial personality disorder.
Even if you've only ticked off 1 or 2 of them(which based on your posts you should have), that's still a bit too close for comfort.
So an advice in general, if you're looking for a potential partner, you'd do well to look for any of these, and if you find them, press the abort button, and run for the trees -
Trust me, it isn't worth it.

Originally Posted by ControlKill

Great post, thank you

I don't think she is anti-social because she has loads of friends and loves meeting new people. I think I'm just gonna have to forget my feelings, hopefully we can still be friends its gonna be awkward though

I've learned a lot from this experience, my friend was actually saying at the start that I was rushing into things and he was right. I think she liked it at first but as she got to know me I guess I just wasn't good enough for her

Originally Posted by hian

A common misunderstanding - Anti-social, does not actually mean a person who is bad at social relations, this is a missuse of the term among laypeople.
An anti-social person is "characterised by an inability to 'empathise', to feel intimacy with, or to form close relationships with others", and partakes in "behaviour that lacks consideration for others and that may cause damage to society, whether intentionally or through negligence"

Sociopaths, psychopaths etc are usually very socially adaptive and skilled people, often described as charming, funny and so forth.

A popular guy or girl, I.E a high social position, liked by many people, aptly described by the term "social chameleon" is the sort of person most likely to fit into the category of sociopath or psychopath.

In any case, don't beat yourself up over this.
If, by any chance, she should be the kind of girl I think she is, then you should just be happy this boat passed you by.
Besides, if she's the kind of girl who'd keep you on your toes like that and then just leave you out in the cold, I think we can safely say she isn't good enough for you(considering you seem to want an actual relationship).

You should just give it time. It will either roll over, or she'll come running back if she figures you were the best bet after all. Just take my advice and don't invest to much feelings into it at this stage.

Originally Posted by ControlKill

Thanks for your advice but I'm done with her my friend just told me stories about her and she is the biggest slut i've ever known. I wouldnt want anything to do with her anymore, theres really something wrong with her

Originally Posted by Testeagle

So yeah umm... what's her number?