You should give Anarchy Online a shot for sure. It hits most of your bullets except the grinding one because there are like 200 lvls or something.
Also you could check out the free trial of EVE its very very different from other MMO's in terms of gameplay either you will get and love it or you'll hate it. EVE is not f2p but there is a 2 week trial, although when your new its sort of weak because you can't afford/fly the cooler ships.
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"Action" f2p hall of fame:
-Infinity
-ATC-Raycrash
-Gunz
-Gunbound
Playing currently -- No mmo's // rpg's; Mostly Team Fortress 2
Recently Retired --
Rumble Fighter: Hoax L2X Striker
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