I want to live a positive life. Be more caring about others. And not be so full of sadness and anger. I love everyone but hate the ones who are bent on destroying this world that god provide us with. I want to quit being mean to my family. I have anger problems and tend to sometimes take it out on them. I want to see my brother quit pills. I want to see my dad quit smoking crack. I want my dad to love me. But he has shown more then once he only cares about his drugs and his girl friend who is a meth addict and crack head. Ive turned my love for him towards hate. I want to see my life turn for good. I want to do good things and help others but im just not sure how to do that. I want my grandmum eye sight to come back. I want her health to getter better. I fear the day of her death. As i will then probably have no one but my brother. I want to have a clear mind and not here voices in my head. I want to have the strength to take my meds. I dont want to be depressed any more. I dont want to be bipolar any more. I don't want to have anxiety any more. I want friends but no one would like me as im not normal. But define normal. In the truth we all are crazy. I want the world to be at peace. I want there to be and end to world hunger. I want a happy world. But sadly this world is a nightmare and i dread everyday i awake from sleep. I want a job to support and help my family. I want to be able to help them with there debts and bills. I only get 600 a month and thats not much to help. We are supposed to pay are debts but its hard. I want to know what its like to feel emotions. Im a stale human who really don't care much. I dont show love much. And im full of hate. but im aslo full of love but its a battle. As my inner self is mad at everyone and dont let me show my true self. I am sorry to all those i have hurt in my life. There is and always will be someone out there that is worse off then me. But i did not have a child hood. Mine was stolen from me. My mum and her friends did things to me which i will not go into detail. Only a few here know. Whom i wont share names. I am screwed up in the head. I hope one day will find peace. But i doubt it. I hope you all forgive me for the things i do. Thanks for reading.
i know this a long post but please read if you want to and please share what you want to do with your life.