You're not offended by the term, "Homo Milk."
You understand the phrase, "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield."
You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.
You drink pop, not soda.
You know what a Mickey and 2-4 mean.
You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for your holidays, with good cigars.
You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.
You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.
You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.
You brag to Americans that: Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion and many more are Canadians.
You know that the C.E.O. of American Airlines is a Canadian!
You know what a touque is.
You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed" not "Zee".
Your local newspaper covers the national news on two pages, but requires six pages for hockey.
You know that the four seasons mean: almost winter, winter, still winter, and roadwork.
You know that when it's 25 degrees outside, it's a warm day.
You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan." (Sas-Kat-chew-wan)
You perk up when you hear the theme song from "Hockey Night in Canada."
You were in grade 12, not the 12th grade.
"Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary and more polite than, "Huh?"
You actually understand these jokes and forward them to all of your Canadian friends! Then you send them to your American friends just to confuse them...further.