Duby, I suffer from severe depression, and I also care for my mother, but it's not something that I feel that everybody needs to be told in every post (In fact, I've never posted it because it's not really relevant to anybody here)
Honestly, from experience, friends can make everything seem ok whilst you're with them/talking to them. It's worth trying to find some good friends that you can hang out with occasionally, it helps a lot. Go for a walk every now and then too, the fresh air helps, and it gives you time away from everything to make a plan of action towards getting better. It's really quite simple to solve the issues you're having, but you have to want to help yourself bad enough or people can't help you.
oh? well damn. thought you could take ged classes online
Nope. You can do practice tests online but not the real thing. Do some research on testing facilities and programs. There are programs that will send a bus or cab to your house everyday to pick Uu up for class and take you there and back. They then educate you and help you get to the point where you can do it. My manager at Wal-Mart was one of those social workers that was in the program he said ppl from all walks of life have done it, but not everyone succeeded only those who wanted to did so.
I'm quite sure if there is even a shiver of hope in your body you'll be able to succeed. That's all we really want from you. Instead of going day by day waiting for "death"as you say often why not do something to make the wait more enjoyable? It's a big world out there, there's good and there's the bad but nevertheless make it worthwhile.