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Thread: A dark cave lies before you.

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    Default A dark cave lies before you.

    Standing in front of said cave, you question why you are here. You ponder more fiercely about how you got here in the first place. Glancing about you notice forest in all direction, no sign of a path but, there is a sign post not too far into the woods to the north.
    Looking up you notice it seems to be getting dark, you wonder if grues are a real thing.

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    what do you want me to do?

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    Feeling a surge of anger about how sexy that sign was, you grasp the sign and pull up, the sign wasn't even in the ground.
    Upon closer inspection you notice it was propped against what looks to be either a skull shaped rock, or a rock shaped skull.
    Sitting down to contemplate life, the skull speaks to you."What the hell are you even doing?" Suddenly, a bra falls from the sky, you question existence as hard as you can for a full seventeen years. Rising from your seat, which you never noticed was there, you notice the sign has changed.

    You don't need to understand Sign to know it was a question: "Why Onrpg...why?"

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    i try to sharpen the bottom of the signpost into a makeshift spear
    i hate TALKING. to PEOPLE. about THINGS

    [center][url="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rdlJ_szMK5I"]

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    Smacking the sign post against the skull/rock/skullrock you chip away enough to create a sort of Sign spear. Evil-doer's beware, you are literate and armed, possibly not in that order.

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    i lift the spear in the air and strike a really cool pose for a few minutes
    i hate TALKING. to PEOPLE. about THINGS

    [center][url="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rdlJ_szMK5I"]

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    Hefting the spear, you strike what you think is a cool pose, But it wasn't. You kinda feel silly standing here holding a sign spear. You're arms begin to hurt.

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    all this work sure got me tired. i enjoy a wonderfully cool and refreshing Pepsi Max™. after that i lie down and take a nap for fourteen more years

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    Laying your spear down, you search your pockets for The Cool, Refreshing taste of a Pepsi Max™, But only find a Crystal Pepsi™. You contemplate shoving the spear into your own temple, but decide to take a nap. Maybe in fifteen years, the Crystal Pepsi™ will see the error of it's ways and become something good.

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    go into the cave

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    Shedding a tear for your friend, you abandon the sign, now the sign will never be oiled up.
    Wandering deeper into the cave, you come upon what looks to be a man made room, it has four exits, one of which is where you came in from.
    The other exits lead to the standard cardinal directions.
    While the room is not very big, you notice there's a lot more stuff in here than there should be. Holding a bed, a bed stand, A book shelf, and for some reason, a toilet. The wallpaper is a hideous shade of Yellow, and the wall has a few paintings, all of them garish as hell. Pondering the meaning of the toilet, you reach for your sign, only to shed another manly tear for your forgotten comrade.

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    You try to cast Lumos, but remember you haven't been to Diagon Alley yet. Hermione is gonna have a ***** fit.

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    Remembering how Frieza killed your best friend, you immediately let your anger flow through you, as your already bulging biceps grow to massive size. You unfortunately rip your clothing off in the process, you are now naked, blond and in a cave. Frankly, your day could be worse.

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    die to xeno in halo matchmaking

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    Destroying the cave with your mastery of the Kamehameha, you fly to the nearest house and kick the owner's ass and take over.
    Logging into Xbox live you receive a message: "Come get rekt scrub -Xenonight", Knowing your body is ready you accept the challange, only to get said Reking.

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    Feeling outrage at your loss, you throw your controller into the television screen, which causes a minor explosion, due to a gas leak that was never fixed. Losing not only your temper, but your house and xbox as well, you realize you are skill naked. You can check dignity off the list of lost items.

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    Using your copious amounts of swagger, you regain some dignity points, your current total is 2/100.

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    throw away all of my dignity points

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    Insert 4 more quarters.
    Play hard. Play smart. Win.
    Work hard. Live smart. Prosper.

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    /wrist and respawn as a ghost and haunt that mans ass

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    Flirting with the man, he cringes even harder away from you, fleeing with as much terror as he can muster. Feeling your love was not returned in kind, you commit ritual sudoku, then you realize you don't understand sudoku. Deciding that being a ghost would be awesome, you will yourself to death, only to return to your body. You are now Dead/undead.

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    i find a stevie nicks record. i put in on and dance for such a long time. like for the longest time i dance.

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    Now that you are in ghost form you decide to bring more dead to the cave.

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    Deciding That you're in the mood to party, or fold laundry. you call up some Ghost pals and Shuffling over to a near by tower records, you purchase a copy of "Street Angel" on vinyl. Placing it upon the gramophone you dance your life/unlife away. Your ghost pals don't seem to want to acknowledge you, someone disagrees with your taste in music and decides he's going to turn it off.

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    now that the music off you decide its better to start a ghost rave since in your human form you liked hard music you put on some gabber and begin to hakken your way into the cave

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