Someone forgets Christine on a train, which after that turns up in former passengers dreams and hugs them in a gay way. They convince it to come out of the closet and find true gay train love, but since it's evil, it doesn't even say thank you.
In a sleepy amurica town, At a local Ihop, one stool, one burden no stool should bear, This Spring watch the gripping tale of a stool trying to survive the onslaught of hefty hefties, The struggles and turbulent times of an Ihop stool will be revealed...
i wake reluctantly to the sound of barking, the beagles are at it again. fvck off beagles.
i roll over, meeting malygos' gaze. this cat is one fat motherfvcker. i get up and put my feet on the cold, parquet flooring frantically tapping my feet around, trying to find my slippers - where the fvck did they go? i hold back my long, luscious hair and take a peek under the bed - i see them. i try to reach, but my sumptious bosom gets in the way. goddamn ****.
i get down on the floor, laying on my stomach. malygos hops down besides me, purring and rubbing his fat face against mine. fvck off stupid cat. i reach for the slippers and get a hold of them, i pull back out and put them on. they're broken. jesus fvcking christ.
The Missing Sun
Sol is gone and we don't know why. Without its warmth, the Earth is quickly dying. Only the insane amount of pollution pumped into the atmosphere in recent years has managed to trap barely enough heat to keep us alive. Forests are dying, water is freezing, humans seem to be on the fast track to extinction.
And finding the sun is up to one boy: Justin Bieber.