This is a screencap from “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure” the video game, on NES. By LJN.
The 80s were filled with video games! The video game boom came and we received so many classics. Titles like The Legend of Zelda, Metroid, Super Mario Bros., Batman, Blaster Master, Beetlejuice, Back to the Future, X-Men. . .Wait, what were those last three!? Those aren’t classics! Who put these on my list? Those last three? Produced by LJN, one of the worst producers of video games in the 80s! If it was based on a real product, you can expect that it was fucking horrible. Sure, you can say “They made Maximum Carnage, and that was great!” But objection!
It wasn’t developed by LJN! That was when Acclaim bought them out and turned LJN into a Publisher instead! I wonder if the LJN devs became jealous that under Acclaim’s banner they created actual games! This was something covered by one of the people I respect the most in the YouTube/press industry, the fine folks at Cinemassacre, the Angry Video Game Nerd. James Rolfe may have spewed nothing but vitriol and bile from his maw as the “Nerd” character, but he’s not wrong! One of the things that drew me to his show was that he may be an asshole as a character, but he really pointed out some horrific things on the NES, my first real console. The Beetlejuice game? Apparently you’re supposed to go on a side-scrolling adventure, use attacks that don’t really do anything to kill cockroaches and shit so that you can buy “scare tactics” in order scare the Deetz family. It had literally nothing to do with the film. Or the cartoon. But to me, the biggest horrific failures they created?
Their X-Men games on the NES! Both of them! They may have done more, but I gave up way way before those may or may not have been created. Is it bad I’d have rather played a Commodore 64 game? Probably. It’s a top-down shit excuse of a game where you control a block of color resembling an X-Man from the 80s team. My personal favorite X-Men team. But if have to have two characters and control them with one controller. The word “controls” is not a thing I’d tack onto this game. How did Nintendo license these? The AI ally constantly gets stuck around things, or stands around doing nothing. It’s probably smarter to use a ranged Mutant for your AI ally. And WOLVERINE. I hate Wolverine as a character, but that’s another rant for another time, but they aren’t even based on the comics. And using his claws takes away his health!? Seriously? He’s a Mutant that has an insane regen/healing factor and cool claws, but why do they kill him? Jesus. LJN are pretty much the worst.
Is there someone else you hate more? Action Enterprises? Some other, more sinister company? Drop us a line with your least favorite game or publisher and why!