Pokémon Go Pick Up Lines: Top Ten

Professor is Watching

Almost everyone it seems is playing Pokémon Go now. People are meeting and creating new friendships that might last a few weeks, or could very well last forever! It’s a wonderful thing. Maybe you are asking yourself, “How can I use Pokémon Go to score a hot date? What are the magic words to make that happen?” Fortunately, I happen to be a Pokémon Professor, and I’m gonna help you out with my top ten favorite Pokémon/Pokémon Go Pick-Up Lines. These are guaranteed* to spice up your life!

10. Those are some nice Jigglypuffs you got there!
9. Can I register your number in my Pokenav?
8. When I look at you, my Metapod can’t get any harder.
7. You must be a Zubat, cause I see you everywhere.
6. My Gyrados is Big enough to ride all night long!
5. Hey, you can reach two Pokestops from my bed. . .
4. I hope you put up a lure, cause I’m gonna be down here for half an hour.
3. Is that a Weedle in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?
2. Hey Girl! Are you a Shiny Pokémon? Cause I’d slap my balls in your face til you give up and stay with me.
1. I have a real, holographic Charizard.

I’d like to take this time to point out that I hate my boss a lot for making me do this. Do you know how many tabs of “Pokémon Pick-Up Lines” are on my computer right now? Far more than I’m comfortable admitting. Yes, Dizzy, I hate you. A lot.

Pokemon Research

Pokémon Research. . .

* Please do not use these. Ragachak is not responsible for slaps to the face, knees to the groin, or any other disappointing groans of disapproval. It’s all jokes, lads and ladies.

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  • Herschel Pilcher III

    I can honestly say my respect for your journalism has never been higher…

    • Ragachak

      That means a lot to me.

  • Phanein

    5/7 The only article I’ve read on ONRPG in a while. Keep up the good work.

    • Ragachak

      And 5/7 is a perfect score, as the world knows. Thank you! That means a lot. I actually have something else that should be interesting coming shortly.