The MMO Bro Code chapter 3: On The Brink Of War
By Kei Beneza (dividelife), OnRPG journalist
What is an MMO Bro? For those of you who don’t know, MMO Bros are probably the most awesome people you’ll find in your favorite MMOs. They are so awesome that they tend to outshine the game, hence the continuous changing of MMOs. What can we say about war? Well, it’s basically the theme of almost every MMO out there-some even use it as a part of their title (hell I don’t know what they’re trying to prove). Much like in real life, some MMO Bros also have roles to play in war, hence the list below. Let’s check it out, shall we?
MMO Bro War class Archetypes
1) The Racist: MMO Wars are all about racism. Though the whole idea of racism is unacceptable IRL, it does serve as a good morale boost in the MMO world. Racists are bitter Bros who have been camped and harassed during their early levels, giving birth to bloodthirsty profane monsters who will flood your screen with hate every time they see the enemy. They are highly skilled in PVP as they train continuously in order to smash their foes once and for all.
Can Bro-volve to: Saurons, Bro Grenade, Archon, Rambo
2) Sauron (yes, from The Lord of the Rings): Was there ever a time when everyone in your group was ordered to take down a single player in a pool of enemy forces? Yes sir! That right there is the Sauron. Saurons are highly skilled players who have been playing the game for a very long time. The game itself no longer poses any form of challenge for them, hence their prowess in the PVP. In some way, Saurons are comparable to your juvenile high school quarterback as they tend to boast a lot (make that most of the time).
3) The Spy: Indeed, what would a war be without spies? One thing about these Bros is that anyone can be one. Though spywork is as easy as creating a level 1 character in the opposing faction, these characters are of utmost importance in the fields of war. This may seem totally unBro-like but like they say, “all is fair in love and war”. Spies are generally weak by nature, but beware as not all spies have weak Bro alts. These Bros are loved by their fellow Bros, despite their despicable profession.
Can Bro-volve to: Archon
1) The Archon: Much like Guild leaders, the Archon’s is a “big Bro’s big Bro”. No, they are not dictators, but rather Bros of high-cali-Bro who have mastered the art of war and its strategies. These Bros must be treated with respect and must be followed to ensure your survival. Archons may not be your race’s Sauron, but there are no rules specifying that Archons cannot be one.
Referred to as: Bro, Sir, kind sir (in RP scenarios)
2) Bro Grenade: We’re not all Saurons and that’s a fact, but of course that doesn’t stop us from wanting to take a few casualties in the first wave. Ironically, Bro Grenades are there to take Saurons down. For those of you who don’t know, these are characters who aren’t as strong as Saurons but make up for it in numbers. The Bro Grenade’s duty is to die after taking twice as many casualties from the enemy faction. Most of these Bros die after a few hits but an army wouldn’t be complete without front liners.
3) Rambo: Rambos are players with a bone to pick. These are mainly racists who just can’t seem to get over their hatred for the opposite faction, resulting in a frenzy of bloodshed all throughout the map. These are people who raid towns, vanquishing newbies without honor. Their methods are totally unBro-like but are still classified as Bros nonetheless.
Rules of Combat
Rule number 1: Never camp newbies
Although they are easy prey, there is an unspoken rule regarding camping. Killing newbies will always be a treat, especially when your Rambo is capable of killing so many; however, this action holds your fellow Bros accountable for whatever beef the other races may hold against you. Your circle of Bros can just opt not to help you when you get camped back, so always be prepared for this scenario.
Rule number 2: ALWAYS obey thy Archon
Even if you’re a Lone MMO Bro, a Veteran, or an Elite Alpha Bro Commander (refer to MMO Bro code 1 & 2 for more details), there’s no excuse in disobeying your Archon. Archons are elected for a reason, and as much as it would be of utter awesomeness to be a lone rule breaker, you can be held responsible for whatever mistake you’re most likely to make in the middle of the battlefield. No one tells Bros what to do, but Bros must always know when to follow and honor their fellow Bros in war.
Rule number 3 for (Raiders): Always do the Bro Walk of WAR
This is not really mandatory, but a Bro’s gotta do what a Bro’s gotta do. The Bro Walk of War is done when you walk around while a bunch of lowbies tries to take you down. So far, the only ones capable of doing this are Saurons and tank characters. Technically, everyone can do this, but their defense will be limited hence only a few seconds of walking awesomeness.
Given scenario: Accretian Gladius/Warder raids the Bellato base and newbies started to call their MAUs (Giant Robot thingy). Normally, you can simply just hack and slash your way through, but Bros are masters of psywar. Yes, walking around or towards a lowbie while their allies are trying to kill you doesn’t really work to your advantage; however, it’s still damn awesome.
Rule number 4: Ze taunt
Always remember that some games have taunting actions that will help you emphasize your victory over your opponents. You don’t really have to say PWND or OWNED every time you kill a dude because that is just retarded. Always treat your enemies with respect. So whenever you kill your enemy, always look for the sit action and spam it on your opponent’s head LOL.
Last words for the war Bros
There are no rules and there’s no way out. Since war is all about PVP, you bet your arse things that things are going to get extremely hot. Much like GMs, a Bro’s job is to make sure the war goes well and bloody. Most people think it’s quite rude for Bros to act like frat boys in a college party, but this is war fool! No way are we hosting social parties in this region. A word of advice? KILL EM ALL.