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Thread: Russia: Man Cuts Off Penis With Scissors After Break-Up

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  1. 03-23-2009, 01:10 PM #1
    cinderboy
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    Default Russia: Man Cuts Off Penis With Scissors After Break-Up

    http://www.mosnews.com/weird/2009/03/20/peniscutoff/



    A 37-year-old man cut off his penis with a pair of scissors after his girlfriend left him. Yet, he was lucky enough to have the organ sewn back on again at a hospital.

    Andrei P., resident of Ufa city in Central Russia, was found bleeding on the floor of his apartment by his neighbors, Life.ru website reports Friday.

    It turned out that after a quarrel with his girlfriend, Andrei decided he wanted to be finished with women for good.

    He went home, took a pair of scissors and cut his penis off.

    “He told us that apparently he did not need his penis since his girlfriend didn’t want to move in with him,” the police investigators said.

    "After two broken marriages, he said he wanted to have nothing in common with women," they added.

    The bleeding man was rushed to a hospital, where doctors were able to repair the damage he had done. That was only possible because, for some reason that he himself cannot explain, after cutting his penis off, Andrei put it on ice.

    "This was one wise thing that he did, if we can at all speak about wisdom in a situation like that," the police commented.
  2. 03-23-2009, 01:12 PM #2
    Deimos
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    what a coward, if he was a real man he would have eaten it or fed it to his dog instead of putting it on ice.
  3. 03-23-2009, 01:12 PM #3
    corasked
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    Whats up with ppl and losin their manhoods in todays time


    There was a news story about how this woman bit her husband's penis off, they found it on the highway and sewed it back on. lol.
  4. 03-23-2009, 01:14 PM #4
    Norrin Radd
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    I can't say I'd ever do that.

    I came close today, though. I got my phone bill in the mail and, honestly, it made me want to cut SOMETHING off.
  5. 03-23-2009, 01:16 PM #5
    Deimos
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    Quote Originally Posted by Norrin Radd View Post
    I came close today, though. I got my phone bill in the mail and, honestly, it made me want to cut SOMETHING off.
    your tongue might be a start.


    ahahahahaha, ill show myself out.
  6. 03-23-2009, 01:19 PM #6
    MageMoa
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    OMG, I can't believe that... I wouldn't be able to live without a penis o.O
  7. 03-23-2009, 01:19 PM #7
    Norrin Radd
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    Quote Originally Posted by Deimos View Post
    your tongue might be a start.


    ahahahahaha, ill show myself out.
    Ohh, I see what you're doing. You're a clever cookie.
  8. 03-23-2009, 01:21 PM #8
    MageMoa
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    Atleast he said tongue, not fingers :o
  9. 03-23-2009, 08:06 PM #9
    power_gamer_6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Deimos View Post
    your tongue might be a start.


    ahahahahaha, ill show myself out.
    Rofl. I lolled. Was I the only one?
  10. 03-23-2009, 01:21 PM #10
    Dreakon
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    Quote Originally Posted by cinderboy View Post
    "After two broken marriages, he said he wanted to have nothing in common with women," they added.
    How ironic... he cuts his penis off to have LESS in common with women. Last I checked, the penis was one of those vital things that made us different.
  11. 03-23-2009, 01:22 PM #11
    Mofo
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    Hardcore emo, eh?
  12. 03-23-2009, 01:32 PM #12
    Oisterman
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    Now he won't have anything in common with MEN either.


    Pre-Sale Season Check in! Garage sales revving up early 2016! Updated 3/13
  13. 03-23-2009, 01:40 PM #13
    Bad Hamster
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    So is this the reason why the emo thing is banned in russia?
  14. 03-23-2009, 01:49 PM #14
    fenix40k
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    crazy man.penis combined with scissors = pain ^^
    he should know that...
  15. 03-23-2009, 01:58 PM #15
    MageMoa
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    The emo: ''Do you feel the pain? Am I only dreaming? Is this burning, an eternal flame?''

    The person that found him: ''No, that's your freaking penis''
  16. 03-23-2009, 02:41 PM #16
    Z0MBiE
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    i'm guessing "nothing in common" is just a bad translation. =/
  17. 03-23-2009, 01:44 PM #17
    Deimos
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dreakon View Post
    How ironic... he cuts his penis off to have LESS in common with women. Last I checked, the penis was one of those vital things that made us different.
    an astute observation sir.
  18. 03-23-2009, 08:09 PM #18
    Cod4Sniper
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    "After two broken marriages, he said he wanted to have nothing in common with women,"

    So being dick-less makes you ..... I won't even go there.
  19. 03-23-2009, 08:12 PM #19
    power_gamer_6
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    Lost in translation, n00b. Just fyi.
  20. 03-23-2009, 11:25 PM #20
    Penguinx
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    On the bright side he now has a nice hospital bill to pay
    Maybe he shouldve opted for a sex change operation .
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