Dear Diary:

Today, I kicked a kid down some stairs, it was pretty rad.
Suddendly his older brother showed up and chased me for half a mile, I finally lost him when I ducked into a back alley. I sighed a sigh of relief and walked out thinking he was gone, but he wasn't he grabbed me by throat and threw me to the ground and began beating me savagely, he beat me to the point of death, later my mom found out and was kinda scared. She said "you're to your auntie and uncles in bel-air." I whistled for a cab and when it came near, the license plate said Fresh and there was dice on the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare, but I though "Nah forget it, yo home to bel-air!" I pulled up to a house about seven or eight, and i yelled to the cabby "Yo holmes, smell ya later." I would look at my kingdom, i was finally there, to sit on my throne as the prince of bel-air.