the lion and the unicorn are fighting for the
presidency of yr country!
here are their political platforms. you need to choose a candidate since according to the law people who don't vote are fired by nuclear powered catapult into the sun
This lion has the solution to solving all conflict until the end of time... but first you must all be put in tiny cells and subjected to waterboarding every day and live on lion poop which tastes like the nastiest thing you can imagine. At the end of 3 days, 5% of the population will be randomly chosen to be set free, and they and all future generations worldwide will live in peace for all time. The rest live in the misery described before until they die.
this unicorn will have sex with everyone once and if you close yr eyes it will be like making love to the most beautiful and skilled man or woman you can imagine. But when you die a race of evil unicorns will be born from yr corpses and future humans will be locked in a grim and eternal war with the evil unicorns.
make yr choice
