The Seventh:- Part Four

[TheJESTERJ]

I might aswell bump this for you, mainly cause I don't want you to double post and ruin your reputation, and partly cause I want to see what you have improved on.

[Raiyne]

Homeric vision means open minded person. Not like the barbarians around him. Im trying to point out that this cheiftain aint stupid.

Then shouldnt it be "His homeric vision made him different as compared to these blood thirsty simpletons he made them seem beast like."?

For the last bit, I think the punctuation is alright. Have you read the rest? If so, whats good about the peice? I tried my best not doing the capital after comma thing, and using less rich vocabulary while moving on the story in a faster pace.

Well the story is progressing at a much better pace now, without all those descriptions. You're improving i guess.