Here at the Bottom Tier News Network, we struggle to offer you only the most important, breaking news. And today we have an absolute bombshell. We love Guild Wars 2, and it’s no big secret that they’re announcing something huge soon. On August 1st, they’re going to have a live stream where they announce the upcoming expansion. These are exciting times we live in! However, I have an inside source though, where they are going to be also announcing a revolutionary idea, one we have never seen in an MMO before. One of the hallmarks of an MMO Expansion is to ultimately get stronger and explore new lands. Increasing the item level, the level cap, the strength of encounters and all-new mechanics in raids. Guild Wars 2 already revolutionized the MMO Landscape when they went from Guild Wars to Guild Wars 2, offering randomly dispersed events to group up with and level without having to only do quests. Where do you go when you’ve already created one of the greatest MMOs to ever exist? Simply adding a new zone and increasing the level cap? That’s not enough.
“Will we see new classes and races in the Guild Wars Universe? I can’t tell you!” said my source in an email earlier this week. “But what I can tell will blow your mind. No other game has been so ambitious, so bold. We considered at first increasing the level cap to 90, but another MMO did that in an expansion, and we at ArenaNet refuse to copy them.” I am so glad to be able to share this information with you. “In the next expansion for Guild Wars 2, we’re going to lower the level cap! That’s right, we’re going from 80 to 65 in the upcoming months. Any game can make you level-up to get stronger and face the new content. We decided that our players want an unprecedented level of challenge, and we’re going to give it to them. Instead of working up, we’re going to increase the level of the enemies without giving players the stats they desire to keep up.”
This is the most incredible announcement I have ever heard from an MMO. Increasing the level cap simply creates an artificial challenge, it isn’t an actually making you work harder. For players who are already at level cap, they will get to pick what skills they lose and can go to a Smith that will lower their current gear down to the correct level. But they have not told me what will become of people who are leveling in the old content. I’m hoping that at the August 1st announcement they will explain the process and how it will change. As a whole, Guild Wars will never be the same in this expansion, and I’m incredibly fortunate to be able to share this with you. It was said in a meeting that “We are immensely proud that our community is the smartest and most skilled across all other MMO games and in this expansion, we’re going to prove it. No other action MMO will be able be able to compete with our revolutionary update. Prepare to go back in time in Guild Wars 2!” I’m cannot tell you how glad I am to see this news. On August 1st, just click this link, and remember I told you so!
Note: This piece is satire.